a war of head vs. heart

abby vanduker, 20, oklahoma

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invisible children
charity: water
liberty in north korea

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Love my baby KD more than most everything.

6 / 12 / 2011 ✧ 110 notes

i’m fighting the clock on this cold or whatever it is to keep it from turning into another sinus infection. my face is swollen, throat swollen, nose is dripping a beautiful mixture of blood and snot. having multiple surgeries on my sinuses and removing my tonsils to maybe fix this issue is starting to sound like a fair deal. thanks to a beaucoup of theraflu, i’m not feeling too bad though.

went to dinner with my parents and a family friend tonight, and our ridiculously cute waiter brought me a perfect raspberry drink after the kitchen brought me pasta with bits of chicken in it. didn’t charge anyone, didn’t even card me. just apologized, slid the glass over on the table, borderline winked, walked off, and didn’t acknowledge its existence again. ugh.

6 / 12 / 2011 ✧ 7 notes

"I’m just trying to survive
What if what you do to survive kills the things you love
Fear’s a powerful thing
It can turn your heart black you can trust
It’ll take your God filled soul
Fill it with devils and dust"

— Devils & Dust by Bruce Springsteen

6 / 12 / 2011 ✧ 8 notes

36 hours to go.

brenthiranaka / by: brenthiranaka

5 / 12 / 2011 ✧ 961 notes

despite being achy all over i am hopping around the house with my nose to the ceiling commanding all the snot in my head to get out.

happy cold and theraflu to me.

4 / 12 / 2011 ✧ 8 notes

"Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; begin it well and serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense."

— Ralph Waldo Emerson

4 / 12 / 2011 ✧ 11 notes

every ordinary night these days, before i manage to fall asleep, alone, i am still consumed by his absence.

it’s truly as if it were only yesterday that a typical evening meant us both planning around the other’s schedule, so we could make the most time to spend on skype, together, likely dozing off and both waking to the same alarm clock, from over a thousand miles away from each other. it was terribly ridiculous, but even more lovely and comforting and imperfectly perfect.
and it’s been five hundred and twenty days and other relationships of every kind have came and went and stuck around, yet every night still feels as if something is horribly, horribly wrong. and it is. and i don’t know why i’m writing this because i still can’t get it right, or, for that, why i’m about to publish this, or anything at all, really. i just miss him so, so much.

2 / 12 / 2011 ✧ 14 notes

2 / 12 / 2011 ✧ 55 notes

“Hard work beats talent, when talent fails to work hard.” -Kevin Durant

i was at this game. love my team, love my city. this season is ours.

ranzcafe / by: ranzcafe

7 / 12 / 2011 ✧ 529 notes

I have the sweetest boss. Gave me butter nail polish, tea, this hidden owl mug and hanging monkey infuser for Christmas! Love love love. (Taken with instagram)

7 / 12 / 2011 ✧ 7 notes